The Last Straw

I know that I said I was turning over a happier leaf, but the reality is that there is nothing interesting to write about if it is all sunshine and rainbows. And the fact of the matter is that no one care enough about me to even read my blog anyway, so what does it matter if I am mean. Also today was the last straw. It seems so contradictory for me to both love and absolutely hate the people I live with. But I do. I cannot even take it anymore. I have tried to accommodate just about everything. I have compromised and the truth is I think that almost every person I live with is an extremely selfish person that has no idea on this Earth how to actually think of someone else's needs.

I pulled an "all nighter" last night to finish a paper. I was up until 3 in the morning. I decided so as to not wake up my roommate I would be considerate and sleep on the couch, thinking anyone that wakes up early will notice me and be quiet. You think I would have learned by now that this never happens because my roommate only care if they want to be asleep or awake. If they want to stay up then they reserve the right to be as loud as they want not matter what ungodly hour it is. Then if they want to go to sleep then heaven forbid me or anyone else to be loud. If I use the same thing they get pissed off at me. So much for equality and loving others right. Well an hour after I go to bed, 4AM. I am woken up by a roommate that for some reason feels the urge to get up at 4 despite the fact that they went to bed like 4 hours before hand. This roommate then proceeds to shake a bag for 15 minutes and then to eat a bowl of cereal for 45minutes as loudly as they possibly can. Then before going back to their room they decide to bang around the kitchen. I being a complete idiot for trying to be nice and not make them feel bad for waking me up just sit there and try to appear asleep. Once they leave I get up and decide to shower, because at least I can sleep in there. But no as soon I get in the shower this same roommate decides to either turn on their shower, despite the fact that they always shower in the evening, or to turn on the dish washer. This instantly turns my shower ice cold.

Now it is almost 6 in the AM and I only got one hour of sleep. I am sick of this. I am sick of feeling like the only things my roommates care about that is connected to me is my TV and my N64. I am just done with it. I am done with thinking about them and doing the considerate thing. I really don't care if for some reason one of them reads this and is hurt because at least I am doing something they never do. I am thinking about what their reaction is going to be. I am not just obliviously writing this. I know they will be hurt and I really don't care anymore.